March 18th was my 1 year Cancerversary.
In the last 365 days I have been diagnosed, scanned, stuck, mapped, injected, debulked, scanned, radiated, cathetered, IV-ed, scanned, stabbed, dissected, studied, scanned, cut, reduced, allergic, knocked-out, reviewed, implanted, monitored, did I mention scanned?
Most days having cancer hasn’t really bothered me. I figure, if someone needed to have cancer it might as well be me. I’m totally cool with it; like a cucumber. With that being said; I have still cused out God, cried until I passed out and have been beyond the realm of pissed off. I am human after all. I have even been jealous of other people’s cancers. I have felt completely alone and considered suicide. I have been so depressed I felt like there was no escape.
I’ve prayed a lot.
I have received so much undeserving love and support it brings tears to my eyes. I have acquired a ton of spectacular people and have been shown how amazing people already around me really are. I have had my eyes opened and my mind slowed.
I have been given a new view point and I have been over filled with joy, loving joy.
I have gotten to and will continue to experience and learn things that most people will never even dip their toes in. Makes me sound super smart when I bust out medical terms.
I love the life my cancer has given me. I love my cancer.
With 365 days behind me the cancer journey is really just beginning and it’s been pretty badass thus far. Cancer is now and will continue to be a huge part of my life but it will not BE my life.
With all that being said, 365 days in, I am completely TUMORLESS!